Hope

Yesterday was one of those rare occasions where Peter and I went in to town together. We had an appointment at the homeopath we’ve been seeing for little over a year now. I always feel hopeful after these visits, despite the fact that Peter’s health – for various reasons – so far hasn’t improved since we first started going. Not one bit. What makes me optimistic is that we personally know people with the same issues (electromagnetic sensitivity) who are completely symptom-free today, thanks to this doctor.

We try to make these outings pleasant by doing something “normal” like eating out, which used to be something we’d enjoy doing (like most couples, I guess). I know that it’s hard for Peter sitting through a meal when the environment is far from ideal with fluorescent lights, wi-fi and people talking and surfing on their cell phones all around. I appreciate that he does it anyway, largely for my benefit.

Yesterday, when we sat there, I thought about what the doctor had said: that he had discovered a mal-function he hadn’t been able to spot before, and that the new treatment should make a difference. That, if he was right, Peter should be able to notice that difference right away. Our next apointment for check-up is in March.

Thinking about the possibility of Peter, if not of being back to “completely healthy” at least to being better, it made me realized how used I’ve gotten to the craziness we’ve been living with. The concept of us being able to do “regular stuff” we never used to think about twice (going to the movies! going out for dinner! meeting freinds in town!) seems so out of this world now. It feels unreal that we might get back to that type of normal at all, let alone in the near future.

Peter, as always, managed to point out the most important issue at hand: “What if all this expensive equipment I’m buying today will be completely useless because I’ve gotten well?!”

Yeah, because if you really are going to be well again by March, our biggest priority will be regretting how much money went down the drain on 19 January …

I guess it’s like the doctor said: When we’re ill, we prioritize our health, are willing to put time, effort and money into regaining it. When we’re well, things are just supposed to run smoothely on their own accord.

Here’s to hoping, and to Peter regaining his health. And to remembering the things we do have that are good. Right here, right now.

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