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Connected in freedom | How I do social media
Hey everybody, spring is truly upon us – maybe not so much out there but inside. Do you feel it, too? As always, when I am entering a new stage in my life, I take some time to reassess what I have done so far, and I re-think the way I have done things.
I feel like doing things differently with my various social media accounts. As you may or may not be aware, I have different ones for different services/themes in my life. Sarine Turhede Photography for my work as a photographer, Healing Art by Sarine for my work as a healer and artist, and Sarine Turhede, the account I originally started just to share my blog articles plus my personal account. Plus the Instagram version of these accounts (@sarineturhedephotography, @healing.art.by.sarine, @sarineturhede), and my blog here on www.sarineturhede.com.
I still feel good about using different channels for different interests because while yes, all of these interests are me, not everyone that is interested in my illustrations or my healing is necessarily interested in my photography, and so on. I know I appreciate when I can follow a specific interest I have in common with someone instead of having to scroll through EVERYTHING they are interested in.
So I am going to continue this social media strategy in the spirit of reader-friendliness. I want you to continue to be free to connect with me via what YOU are interested in – whether that is all of my services, a specific interest, or me as a person.
And in the spirit of direct and clear communication, I decided that I am going to change things up a little with my personal account and my page on facebook. Like I said, up until now the purpose of the two has been to share my blog articles on my page, and kind of anything that I felt like on my personal account. I used to share very little of others on my personal account because I always felt that when I click on someone’s personal profile, I want to see what that person is about, not what they think I should read or who they think is inspirational.
But I feel more and more these days, that expressing my appreciation for others work, for giving credit to those who inspire me, and lifting those who I think do good needs a place, while I still want to have a place that that is just me. Not because I want to create the illusion that the two are separate, of course who/what inspires me is deeply connected to what I put out. But because it’s how I like to be able to read things. I appreciate when I can follow specific people, their work or their interests, but it doesn’t necessarily mean I am interested in what they think is inspirational of who they think I should vote for.
So what I have come up with is that I want to use my personal facebook account more to lift people and phenomena that inspire me. Conversely I am going to use my blog and my facebook page more to share the stuff that is me. My thoughts on life, what I am doing. Both personal and business, but since my personal life right now is pretty much all about my business, you’ll see a lot of that.
Again, I want you to be free to connect with me on whatever level that interests YOU. No hard feelings if that means you’re going to unfollow me on some or even all channels. If you choose to follow my facebook page but not my personal account, make sure to click „see posts from this page first“ since facebook pretty much buries everything that comes from a page that isn’t a boosted post or an ad – unless you chose to see posts from that page first.
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15 bloggers who inspire me | The VBA Part 2
„Honor those bloggers who bring something special to your life whether every day or only now and then.“ – I like that.
I thought I’d write a little about each of the 15 bloggers I chose because I want you to know what it is that I appreciate about them. That is not part of the VBA rules, and I now that I’ve done this I can see why: it’s very time-consuming. It’s taken me almost a week now to finish this post because even just writing a few lines about each blogger means I need to pinpoint what it is I love about these people. It felt like an important part of the process though (possibly even the most important one), so I guess it was worth the time. So here they are, in no particular order:
- Yolanda Bertaud from ByzantineFlowers – I love diy stuff, especially when it’s about health. I can’t count the times I made the coffee scrub. It’s addictive (in the best way!) and a great gift.
- Angela from Angie & James Do Stuff – Travel and food, two of the great loves of my life. This gluten-free chocolate cake is one of my all time favorites, especially during the wintertime.
- Kristie Wolf from Tiny House On The Prairie – It seems this lady is more active on Instagram and Facebook these days than on her blog. But I chose Kristie anyway because what she’s doing is just so amazing. I think she’s done four tiny houses now plus a wedding venue. I would especially love to check out the tiny tree house on Hawaii, and the Crystal Peak Lookout (and not just because I’m a crystal healer).
- The Dervaes Family from The Urban Homestead – When my ex-husband and I bought our house, I remember thinking that it was too little land. Then I came across The Urban Homestead and their film Homegrown Revolution, and that made me realize that it’s about what you make from what you get. Also, I had no idea what I was talking about at the time. We were totally overwhelmed by the „too small“ garden the first year(s). Don’t currently have my own garden but I still like to follow the Urban Homestead.
- Maria Österåker from Lev mer på mindre – A Finnish blog (in Swedish). Also a blog that I came across during my years on the Swedish country-side. It’s where I found the best diy for making your own deodorant ever.
- Rania Rönntoft from Rowan Tree. – Whenever I miss Sweden (and that does happen), and especially the Sundsvall area where I spent the past few years, this is my go-to blog. Lots of beautiful pictures which I’m sure you can appreciate even when you don’t understand Swedish.
- My mentor Irka Schmuck writes a blog on her homepage, and of course I think she’s inspirational – that’s why I chose her to coach me when I decided to start my own business. The blog’s in German. I recommend it to anyone who is interested in personal growth, especially when it comes to living in abundance. (Note: This is not an affiliate link or anything like that. I chose Irka because how could I not!?)
- Sina Nanasi is another source of inspiration to me when it comes to personal growth. Sina’s focus is on working with the inner child, so that’s what her blog (also in German) is about. It seems like the possibilities are endless these days when it comes to workshops and seminars in the field of personal and spiritual development. And that’s a good thing, in my opinion! Still, I’m picky. For a person who is so hugely interested in their personal growth, I go to very little workshops on the subject. I did go to Sina’s Inner Child Workshop (also in German), and it was full of revelations for me. (Again, this is not an affiliate link, either. I just can’t think of anyone who would not benefit from her Inner Child seminar.)
- Heather Baird from Sprinkle Bakes – Pastries and art, a very good combo. I discovered Heather when I came across her first recipe book, SprinkleBakes at the library. That was the first time I saw a cook book this fun and colorful – it appealed to my inner child and the artist in me (the two are pretty inseparable, really).
- Kristen Kay, Las Vegas Wedding Photographer. I’s not so much the weddings but the way Kristen captures the desert that I am interested in. When I was 17 I spent a year as an exchange student in a small town outside Las Vegas, and I still love the nature there and long for it from time to time. I know, it’s not the first thing you think of when you hear Vegas, and I think I can even hear some of you say „What nature!?“. So Kristen is my go-to girl whenever I miss the Mojave desert.
- Justina Blakeney from The Jungalow. I discovered The Jungalow on Instagram.If I could, that’s where I’d live. In Justina’s Instagram. 🙂 I don’t think I need to explain what I love here, the pictures speak for themselves. Like, loud and joyfully.
- Erin Benzakein from Floret Flowers. Another source of inspiration I found via Instagram. Maybe I could divvy up my time and partly live in The Jungalow, and partly on Erin’s Instagram feed … This is all my inner child dreaming out loud. Again, the pictures pretty much say it all, I feel no need to explain why I find Erin inspirational. Maybe I should add though, that Sarine means „The one who feeds the flowers of God“ …
- Rachel Brathen aka Yoga Girl. Rachel has definitely been one of my biggest sources of inspiration over the past years. I didn’t fall for her immediately, you can read about all the whys and hows and what changed my mind here. It’s her honesty about how she deals with life that inspires me. She’s one of those people that don’t make me go „Oh, I wish I was her“ but a constant reminder that „Oh, that’s right, I want to be myself more“.
- Kate Bingaman-Burt. I love her drawings, the style is so fun and playful, and it definitely inspires my own drawing. When I cleared out my stuff in order to start my traveling, her art prints where among the objects that meant the most to me. I am not very attached to stuff, but when I am, I always make sure that I know those things go to someone I know will appreciate them and give them a good home. So my KBB prints are with my sister now.
- Anja from Woodlights Woudlicht. I lovelove Anja’s beautiful and delicate crystal grids, and her poems that go with them. I love when healing and art come together like that. Seeing Anja’s crystal grids on Instagram made me want to find my way to combine my being a crystal healer with my artistic side. Thank you Anja for inspiring me to become Sarine’s Crystal Oracle.
I know there’s probably not much point in picking those really large accounts for an award like this, and part of me thinks I should have picked more people who would actually respond to the nomination, and also, that it would be nicer to pick those who have just begun to encourage them. But in the end, I did want to be true and pick those who bring joy to my everyday life, regardless of their size, and the likelihood of them responding to this. There are obviously a lot more people who inspire me, not all of them have a blog, and not all of them are on social media.
Doing this nominating thing made me aware that there’s this part of me that feels guilty, that wants to please everybody, and that wonders whether I hurt anybody’s feelings by not picking them … I guess this is where I come full circle, back to the issue I addressed in my first blog post on the VBA. If we feel unseen, or we do things because we’re seeking others validation, it’s really us who are not appreciating our own worth. When we do, others will follow.
OMG, I can’t believe this has turned into such a big thing. I still have one more hoop to jump through, which is telling Katey 7 things about me. I think I am going to make that a third (!?) post.
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The Business of Bringing People Joy
Writing that post On Wanting and Being Content made me think more about appreciation. To be more specific, it made me think more about the aspect of expressing appreciation, and what role it plays in the entire process of getting what we want.
I have noticed that when it comes to attracting good things into my life, they come easily when I am putting very little (or rather: very light) energy into the thought of wanting them. Almost as if I am not even really aware I want them. It’s like the thought „Oh, this would be nice“ just kind of flies by, and I only remember it when I suddenly receive whatever it was I thought would be nice.
For instance, a friend posted something on Facebook about how she had gathered so much burlap that she was able to make 6 lbs of pesto from it. That friend was nowhere in my vicinity at that time, so when I commented how cool I thought that was and how much I loved burlap, it was not a subtle way of inviting myself over for dinner. I just wrote what I thought. A few days later, another friend came to visit. She brought me a bunch of burlap. Yes, I know, it’s technically possible that she saw my comment (she didn’t mention it, though).
Still, it felt like the lightness with which I had expressed my appreciation of burlap had kind of send out a message, and someone who was in charge of bringing people joy had just picked it up, and thought „Oh, here’s someone who shows appreciation of burlap. We’re in the business of bringing people joy, so let’s send this lady some burlap.“
Maybe this all sounds very silly because, seriously, who gets that excited about burlap?! I know, but here’s what I believe: when we are able to wish for something with lightness, it’s easy to have that wish fulfilled. I believe that whoever is in charge of this Business of Bringing People Joy likes it when we ask for things out of a state of „This would bring me joy but my life’s happiness is not dependent on it. If you can do it, it would make me happy – but I’ll still be happy if it doesn’t work out“. That’s why it’s so easy to have those seemingly small and not very significant wishes fulfilled – because those are the ones I am capable of sending out there with that kind of lightness. Like expressing that I enjoy burlap.
When it comes to The Big Ones however … Not so easy maintaining that sort of attitude, that’s why they are The Big Ones, right? They are the wishes we feel are important, the ones our happiness depends on. So is the reason why it’s harder to have those fulfilled that the folks at The Business of Bringing People Joy don’t like it when we pressure them with desperate requests? Maybe they don’t like it when we burden them with the claim that our entire life’s happiness is dependent on our satisfaction with a specific order we placed? Maybe. Here is what I believe:
I believe that the communication between us customers and folks at the BBPJ is off a little sometimes. OK: a lot, and like, all the time. And like with any order we place with any company these days, we click on the button that says „Yes, I agree to the terms of service“ without actually reading the fine print. Because, seriously, who has time for that?! We just kind of trust that it’ll be alright. And it is. After all, it’s The Business of Bringing People Joy. However, if we did bother to open the file with the terms of agreement we’d find out it’s actually not that much, and the rules are very simple:
1. You get exactly what you ask for. To the t. Because the employees at the BBPJ are a very literal bunch, and they would get into serious legal trouble if they gave you anything you hadn’t asked for.
2. Your order is not just the words you use, it’s also the emotions behind it. And again: they take you very literally. If there is ease behind your request, you get your order with ease. If there is pressure in it, pressure is what you get. And so forth. You get it.
3. Maybe you’ve heard that if you want to remember something, you should tell yourself „Remember to do xyz“ because if you tell yourself „Don’t forget xyz“ you’ll actually forget because the mind doesn’t really know how to compute the words „don’t“ and „not“, and just skips them. The BBPJ works just like that. They don’t understand the words „not“ and „don’t“, so they just skip them. So always use positive descriptions to place your order. For instance: instead of saying „I don’t want more burlap“, place an order that states what it is you want instead.
4. And, the most important rule of communication: you place your order by thinking and through your actions. Your orders are prioritized, that’s why not every single thought and every single action is being answered right away. It’s all about focus. To the employees at the BBPJ „focus“ is „appreciation“. They assume that you want more of whatever it is your focusing on, so naturally those orders have top priority. Again, they take the emotions behind your focus into consideration when processing your order. That is why customers who seemingly place similar orders may receive services/products of varying quality.
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On choices
As some of you know, I have lived a pretty secluded life over the past few years. House on the Swedish countryside, no internet at home, limited cell phone use, long distances to my friends and not very travel-friendly (or super travel-friendly, depending on how you look at it – pretty much every outing was a trip in its own rights).
I am grateful for the experience. It taught me to appreciate and value things I didn’t use to pay much attention to – or that I even used to avoid. Being close to nature. Being alone with myself without any distractions. Stillness, both on the outside and within me.
On my good days, I could appreciate the gift that this period of my life was, even then. On my bad days, I hated that I didn’t have a choice.
If I allowed myself to give up my resistance and surrender to what it was I would have wanted to distract myself from, I always came out on the other side being thankful for it. I don’t know if I’d had the strength to make myself do that if I’d had a choice.
More often than not I was glad to have an excuse to switch my phone off and not be available all all the time. I found that I am not as adverse to being outdoors as I thought I was, moreover: I discovered the deep feeling of connection to all living things that you only experience when you find yourself fully immersed in the beauty of nature. There’s no cell phone plan for that.
Having gone through those experiences, especially through my own resistance, I can see how I benefit from them now that I am in a different place, where I suddenly do have all those choices I wanted so badly back then.
I can actually feel the need to go outside and find a place where I feel close to nature because I know now that these are places where I connect with myself. I can feel the need to turn my computer and phone off at a certain point during the day. I am not afraid anymore of missing out if I’m not connected to social media 24/7. I understand now that when the feeling arises that I am losing touch with myself, the answer is never to be found outside of myself, in distraction. I always find it by turning inwards, towards whatever shape that feeling comes in. It may be triggered by my mind getting hung up on something someone said, or something I read somewhere that struck a chord.
Therefore I continue to be grateful for knowing the place where the lack of choices forced me to turn to the only thing that was left: facing myself. Now that I am in a place again where I have many options, this makes it easy for me to choose.
Facing ourselves, tackling that resistance even when we technically don’t have to, when we could distract ourselves, is always worth it. For all the things we try to avoid seeing in and about ourselves lead to great treasures.
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